A night like tonight...summer heat...starry sky...lightening bugs and noisy street...cars going by...the activity of a typical July evening...I told Teddy I just think I need to see Adam out on the deck...smoking a ciggie and people driving by beeping their horns at him...he'd always nod and wave...big smiles...if I try...I can almost envision that picture in my mind...because I saw it so many times before. I still can't believe he's gone...time is passing by and I am missing him more...we know the reality of where he is...but I'm trying to hold onto thoughts like that to help me get through these rough times...