Dear Adam,
.....I know many people have been so kind to pray for us. I do have a strong Faith...I go to Mass weekly, I never miss...you'd be proud of how hard I am trying... I get such strength from it. Even shortly after you passed, I found a Catholic church in Hazleton that I attended until I felt strong enough to attend our own. I have met with others who lost kids...I met with clergy and chaplains...I go to grief therapy and have met with our workplace Psychologist....all great attempts to get on and stay on the right track. It's a lonesome battle...but each day, I do get up...I go through my rituals and go off to care for the sick. I never stopped caring...thank God for that. I am just so wounded...and I (more often lately) don't want to keep talking about my loss....it seems to make me even sadder. So I blog, pray, walk and try and circulate and surround myself with people who truly care...and it's so sad that I see and hear from others who are in "fear" of being around us...imagine that...me and dad stricking uncertainty with anyone? I know it's because they fear they'll say the wrong thing...or maybe think this could actually happen in their own lives...which it could. Our home was as normal as normal could get...I wish things become normal someday...again, you fill my every thought and I love you forever...my life now is different but the imprints you've left upon my heart will live on eternally....