it was a Wednesday night...I just got done watching St. Elsewhere...I was tired...Ted was sick...I believe he drank half the bottle of NyQuil that evening....I just settled in for the night, having tucked my precious two year old into his beddie...Jordan slept soundly as it started...the labor pains and the gush of my water breaking...Ted had to muster up strength to fight off the sickness and be there at my side...because Adam was making his grand entrance...his birth was beautiful and perfect...like it was orchestrated to be that way...and amazingly, Ted forgot about how sick he was as he became the world's best dad for a second time at 4:37 a.m. on a Thursday morning..."odd hour to make your arrival" we'd tell him years later...and a little tow headed toddler awakened that morning to the news that he became a big brother...that was the moment in my life...that I felt the most completely gratified...roses sat alongside my bedside with a simple card...stating "I love you...thank you for my sons...you amaze me"...and that's how it was...tomorrow would be Adam's 23rd birthday...it seems like yesterday that we celebrated his 22nd...how could the months have passed by so quickly...as we, lost in a fog...saw 10 months pass us by....how can this be...a birthday without you here with us Adam??? There is no gift to give...for you're not here to open it...no card to send...no cake to be eaten...just lots of prayers and Hopes that you see all you meant to us...the innocence and sweetness you possessed...the heart of an angel...touching all those you came in contact with...we, the many who LOVED you...think of you always....and cherish the person you were...I hold so many memories....so many proud moments...I am who I am because of you, I after all, was Adam's mom...I still am...and I, like those many others whose lives you touched...will carry with me...every day...a love that is like a flame...burning eternal...until we embrace once again...I love you....always and forever....