Dear Adam...
Since you're gone, I've lost the keen focus that I once possessed...it's hard thinking of things other than you...but we have to...because we need to live...we need to work...and we need to relate. I was trying to do so many things at once yesterday combined with trying to cut Jordan's hair...a new task I've been appointed to...however with what happened yesterday, he may never let me near the clippers again...I thought about you...and how you'd let Hontz shave you down for relief in the summer's heat...I remember last summer and how as he shaved your long locks, he jokingly threatened me that he'd give you a mohawk...yes, and then those remebrances of you and Jordan in the barber chair...freshly shorn little heads, you and he had to have been the sweetest little boys ever...as you'd run out of Harry Carroll's with lollipops and smiles...you called those cuts "moonies"...as I cut Jordan's hair, I accidently let one of the guards slip and the blade went straight to the "moonie" cut...poor Jordan with an unanticipated moonie...overwhelmed by being hectic on top of Jordan telling me how difficult days still tend to be...and me, just trying to "be" the person I am expected to be...mighty big goals I have. He held me later and told me it's fine...I felt so stupid...Dad sat right down after my blunder and said..."go ahead Lori, give me the same cut"...so I did and my two guys with moonies existed once again...although it was Dad who took your place...Walking into church today, a few people laughingly remarked..."looks like you guys lost a bet"...and they just smiled...