My Beloved Son

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Dear Adam-- This year is my year of changes...after you died, I know a huge part of me died too...I still suffer the lingering blows your death placed upon me...but somewhere, somehow, I got some strength...and your dad and I are working toward a cause, one you'd be amazed by, hopefully, we'll be able to fulfill this commitment we made, to trek 65 miles from Philly to Atlantic City...nothing's been easy, the thoughts of being able to continue living after you left me seemed dismal...and here I am, 47 and reaching goals that only strong people attain, not someone like I ride on Sunday, I'm wearing your riding gloves...wearing your necklace (the one with the shamrock) and I've trained hundreds of miles on your old bike. Of course I fell a time or two...but you know what??? Somehow I got back up and back on...when I ride along the beautiful pathways with your dad, I envision you, your blonde hair blowing in the breeze, riding right alongside me, I hear your laughter in the air, as I traverse onward, I hear your voice in the distance, cheering me on---I feel your gentle push on my shoulders, telling me you're right behind me, NO one loved you as I a mom I know this is truth...I miss you each moment of each day...I keep hoping that this heaviness will lessen...the exasperating feeling that you are no here, with us... ride with me...this week-end, keep watch over us and help us stay safe, I love you, always and forever, your Mom XOXO

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