changes...in this past year I have lost three remarkable friends, Dennis died one year ago....his passing was sudden and unanticipated...with this also meant his wife, a very dear friend of mine moved far away---so my loss was multiplied...then one of my oldest friends I knew since kindergarten passed away, again, sudden loss...leaving behind two daughters, one still in high school....leaving me feeling at a loss of how sudden we can lose someone...Angie was in and out of my life....a steady friend throughout all our school years and even through nursing school...then moving away...and sometimes our paths would cross intermittently, but when Adam died, she resurfaced and helped me through my grief...watching her kids struggle through a week of utter Hell is something no kid should see or deal with...with hope I wish that her love and God's Grace they'll weather this storm...last month my solid rock of a friend succumbed to the horrible grip of cancer....as it reared it's ugly head and stole  another beautiful person away from me and all of those who knew her...Mary....I met her when Jordan and Adam were little boys and Jordan was fighting with Will in our alley.  She was very different than me, watching her I learned how to stick up for myself, how to be stronger...she did nice things that no one knew of and to me, there is nothing at all cooler than that...she didn't lose sleep over what others thought and she loved my boys like her own...when Adam died it was her and her family that got eggfest going...I knew at eggfest7 she turned another corner...but not in a good way, she was faltering health-wise and the spark that once enveloped her was fading, watching her decline was so hard....I miss her so much...I miss them all so much, because you see, each of them played a vital role in helping me, us...my Faith is strong and I am choosing to believe that God did assign each of them a task to help us here, and I know Adam opened his great big arms to welcome them in....each of them embraced in his teddy bear hugs, if I am wrong, it's a beautiful thought anyway....I guess what I have learned even more so is that life is fleeting...you simply don't know what tomorrow holds...so we need to embrace each day and live it to the fullest....

time....

....it seems so long since I've seen you....time steals away so much.  Time...at first...was second to second...the time that would pass between the breaths of despair....time...aided in helping me escape those moments...allowing me to survive into minutes...and in time, I was able to tolerate hours...but you still fill each day with immeasurable thoughts and memories of you, me, us...our family.  Your laugh is probably what I miss hearing most...and since you're gone, I look constantly for reassurances of you...sending me signs...letting me know that in time...I, too will see you again....time....I simply miss you so much....