...the glisten of newly fallen snow, mesmerising icy crystals falling haphazardly outside my window...as I sit remembering many winters past and the joy that once abounded around our little home...the sounds of laughter in my yard...the squeals of happy children playing on our block...the sights we'd take in...from our eyes to our hearts...utter happiness...completely fulfilling...decorating the tree...baking cookies and making cocoa...the sparkle in each of our eyes as we'd daydream about Christmas...but to us, to Ted and I...the best part was the fasination...being parents allowed us to witness the amazement in our children's eyes...it was the best of times...it was easy to delight them...and seeing their delight made us happy. This year is different...and I see we're not alone...sadly, I know there are others in towns quite close, that will be mourning the losses of sons also taken too soon...as they reflect back on the joys they, too had once felt...and the sadness and emptiness that has now replaced that happiness...when all is going well...many of us "forget" about those in desperate situations...not that anyone ever means to...we just "get really caught up" in life...in general...and sometimes as we stand trimming our tree...listening to festive Christmas music...there's another family on the block clinging to each other crying...because this Christmas...someone dear is absent...there's an empty chair at a table somewhere....a present 'neath the tree that can't be opened this year....because it's intended loved one isn't here to open it...there's people left here...alone and empty to try and live on without their lifeline...Christmas...the birth of God's son...I never lost track of that being the true meaning of Christmas...I pray as Ted does....that God will give us...and those others like us....strength to get through. I hope God's gift to us..is continued healing....continued Faith....continued strength....I anxiously await to turn the page of the calendar to start a new year....perhaps one filled with a better understanding of all we endured...perhaps new hope...in times that seem bleak.........